Don’t force it.
You are not in a competition with anybody – especially your ex.
Resist the urge to merge just because your ex has found another (or had been keeping him or her on the down low during the marriage).
If it comes naturally, then by all means get involved – just don’t settle. I’m not going to list the settle signs, because they are as individual as you are and only you know the truth.
Call it your inner voice, common sense or the soft sounds you attempt to silence that is saying – Don’t go there!
Settling may already be familiar to you – your last marriage perhaps? You may be feeling indignant that he could possibly live without you. If you secretly or overtly thought yourself better than your mate, than some soul-searching is required on your part. Nobody wants to feel less than. Conversely, if your past partner constantly felt the need to remind what a catch you had, be glad that Flipper is free and back in the sea.
Being alone scares some women more than being in a bad, unhealthy or loveless relationship. If you’re of the mindset that any relationship is better than none at all, seek professional counseling or volunteer at a battered women’s shelter. You’ll be glad you did.